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Ten Things I Hate About This (Milwaukee Situation)

The events of this week should seem oddly familiar.

Some Heat fans. Or the Village People.
Some Heat fans. Or the Village People.
Marc Serota

If you haven't watched 'Ten Things I Hate About You,' you should immediately do so for two reasons. First, it's a funny movie that successfully recaptures the living hell that was being a teenager. Second, it will make the events of this week seem oddly familiar.

Here is the trailer for the movie:

In the movie, which is a modern-day retelling of 'The Taming of the Shrew,' we have two sisters, Bianca and Kat. Bianca wants to date boys, but her overprotective father won't let her. Kat would just as soon shoot a boy as look at one.

One day the father strikes a bargain with Bianca. "Ok, you can date ... when she does." Bianca replies "But she's a mutant! What if she never dates?" to which daddy responds, "Then you'll never date. Ooh, I like that."

The rest of the movie was about trying to get Kat to fall in love with Heath Ledger.

What does this have to do with anything?

On Wednesday, published a story by Brian Windhorst with the following two quotes from NBA Commissioner Adam Silver. Taylor Bartle did a write-up on it.

"Seattle is a wonderful market. It would be very additive to the league to have a team there," Silver said in an interview this week with ESPN. "But we're not planning on expanding right now, so it's not a function of price."

"Ultimately I'm responsible for the financial and competitive health of a 30-team league, and while we made tremendous strides in the last collective bargaining agreement, we're still not there yet. We don't have 30 profitable teams in the NBA, and while we've made progress, there are still teams that aren't competitive enough."

Windhorst drew a few different conclusions in his story, but the main point was that the Milwaukee ownership/arena situation had to be resolved before our situation could even be seriously considered.

Here we are, having been without our team for several years now, dying to get back into the NBA with our nearly shovel-ready, shiny new arena. Here we are after the heart-breaking near miss from last year and Silver is telling us "Ok, you can date ... when Milwaukee does."

So the rest of our movie is going to be about finding a date for the City of Milwaukee.

It will be about finding an ownership group that Herb Kohl feels comfortable with and that won't try to relocate the Bucks here, because we sure as Shinola don't want them. It will be about finding a government agency in that state that will help the city fund a shiny new arena of its own. We must find Milwaukee's Heath Ledger.

Our very own Kevin Nesgoda has already begun the process with a Craigslist ad in Milwaukee. So far, my offer of ten "bucks" has been the only response.

There is hope, however. In yesterday's post-game radio broadcast for the Bucks (found by our very own Silvio), there was a report of a potential ownership group with deep pockets that are interested in purchasing the team, keeping it in Milwaukee, and trying to get an arena done. Some concern was expressed as to whether Kohl would be receptive to the group.

Please, don't let Kohl be a mutant.